The Beginning of Change

After living in my own apartment for 2 years, I finally got to the point that all the debt that I had accumulated with my ex was paid. I was finally out from under the $20,000+ that I was left with. Now it was time for me to get back to college and get my degree that I had been working on over the past 6 years. Things finally started to look a bit brighter for me and my son’s future. I met an amazing man (we will call him Matt). Matt was so supportive and willing to listen to me and help in anyway that he could. When it was time to renew the lease on my apartment Matt and I decided that it would be a good idea for me to move home with my parents for a while to get my car paid off and pay off a credit card that I had. I could also use that time of living at home to save money. So I made the move back home with my parents. While living at home with my parents I was able to pay my car off about a year early. I was also able to get my credit cards paid off and save some money up. About 2 years after living with my parents I graduated from college with my Bachelors degree and got a promotion at work. This promotion came with double the money I was making in my previous position. This was definitely a huge positive in my life and things were looking good. If things were looking so good then why did I feel like I had a gray cloud over me? Why did I feel like things were so terrible? I put on a brave face everyday and pushed through my “dark” days. Most of these days came with a fake smile while at work and then home to take a nap because I was emotionally exhausted from all the faking. I just felt like I could not get out from under that dark cloud that was following me around.